The Compleat Idiot’s Guide to the INTJ

Table of Contents

  1. > Introduction <
  2. INTJ Overview
  3. Conversing with an INTJ
  4. Frequently Asked Questions
  5. Credits


Welcome to yet another document about INTJs.

Numerous INTJ resources are available on the web, but they are all descriptive (telling you some things about us) without being particularly prescriptive (instructing you on how to deal with us). So we – a bunch of INTJs – decided to rectify that situation by providing you this convenient, handsomely designed, and eminently well-written instructional guide. Targeted towards the friends, co-workers, and relatives of INTJs, this handbook is intended to provide you with the understanding necessary to make your interactions with us go smoother, and to surround you with butterflies and sunshine.

Okay, our integrity demands we admit the real goal is to make life easier for us. Since only about 1% or 2% of the general population are INTJs and we’re a pretty reclusive bunch, we’re probably a mystery to you. Consequently you don’t really know how to interact with us, and many of you tend to annoy us. Hopefully this guide will help alleviate that. We just thought if we made it about you and your needs you’d be more likely to read it. You needy bastards.

438 thoughts on “The Compleat Idiot’s Guide to the INTJ

  1. I am a female INTJ. Growing up I felt out of place almost everywhere I went, hated & still hate small talk especially with what I consider stupid people. With age, I have become comfortable in my skin & with who I am. I have learned to turn the charm off & on, which is helpful in my profession. I work in the legal field so I like to claim that I am a product of my work environment. There are times when my daughter tells me to “pull back” because I am coming across as aggressive which tends to intimidate both men and women. More times tha none, I don’t realize that I am coming across as aggressive and I appreciate her pointing it out to me.

    My friends are mostly male but I do have 3 female friends, 2 of which I have been friends with for at least 15 years. One of my female friends said, “Women either love or hate you. If they don’t like you, then they are free to walk away. I like the way your brain works, it’s hilarious!” My best friend & I have been friends for about 30 years, we accept each other faults & she has learned not to be sensitive around me because she never knows what is going to come out of my mouth. Before she introduces me to a friend of hers, she always warns them, “She’s comes across as snobbish but she isn’t, she is very nice . . . oh & she has a sarcasstic wit so prepare yourself.”

    My brother once told me that I should have been born a gay man because I’m very feminine but my thought process is very man like. I joke with my friends that sometimes I feel like a man in a woman’s body. I’m that woman that is able to have a beer & watch sports with the guys then turn around & go out with my female friends without skipping a beat – something my best friend has never understood.

    One thing that always comes up when I’m in a relationship with a man is that they don’t understand why I don’t like to spoon/cuddle. I get, “Really? But you’re a woman, you’re suppose to like to cuddle. Why don’t you like to spoon/cuddle? Are you seriously falling asleep right now?” My response is automatic, I say, “Take it as a compliment, if you did your job right, I’m going to roll over & fall sleep almost immediately. If you exceeded my expectations, I will be snoring within 3 seconds of rolling over.” I have gotten some interesting looks but none have asked for an explanation which is great for me because I hate wasting my time trying to justify why I like or don’t like something – it’s just the way I am.

    It takes a very strong man to be with a female INTJ.

  2. It seems strange that, if you are as logical and intelligent as you claim, none of you have done any research and realised that INTJ (and all the other Myers Briggs personality types) have been widely discredited due to poor reliability and validity and a lack of theoretic integrity.

    1. Dear Megan. These personality tests can indeed be unreliable and therefore are rejected by many psychologists. Many people including myself know this. I can’t speak for all users of the Myers and Briggs tests, but I have come to the conclusion that these tests can be extremely helpful if used the right way and its limitations are kept in mind.
      The main problem with the test is that it categorizes people into one of two groups such as introvert vs. extrovert. In reality, introvert vs. extrovert is a scale which many people are in the middle of. Many people don’t fit perfectly into any of the personality types which allows for mislabeling of a person. It is for this reason that these personality tests should not be used to categorize, which is how they are used in job searches.
      Although they cannot assess a person with enough accuracy to be scientifically useful, the tests can be very helpful in several ways.
      If you realize that introversion vs. extroversion is a continuum, you can read about tendencies of each to figure out where on the continuum you might be. Some tests will show you what percentage of each letter you have chosen the corresponding question to. I myself lean very strongly towards INT and am in the middle between J and P. it would be bad for an interviewer to take this information and base a decision on it, but it would be a great starting place for them to come up with questions to ask in an interview.
      To effectively use these tests you should not be seeking to label yourself, but to look at the reasoning behind why the test has labeled you how it did. You should keep in mind that there are aspects of yourself which the test does not take into account, therefore any assumptions it makes about you should be taken as advice, not truth. In many cases you may find that you belong between two groups such as myself being half INTJ and half INTP. Advice given to by the internet with the assumption that I am INTJ or that I am INTP is not tailored to me with complete accuracy that a psychologist would want. It is however, tailored to me far more than a general advice forum is.
      The test knows only what you tell it about yourself and then tries to make conclusions about you. Because nobody fully knows themselves and the conclusions made could be incorrectly deduced even when the original information is accurate, a person should not treat anything the test say as fact. However, if a person entertains the idea that what these tests say about them might be true yet likely just seems true at a glance and is not, it is very possible they realize things about themselves they wouldn’t have otherwise.

      1. I agree 100% with this statement. I used MBTI to get a general idea of my personality and learn more about who I am. There are so many dimensions to a personality. I am classified as an ENTJ but I am more of an ambivert. I go back and forth between being extroverted and introverted on a daily basis.

    2. So, it’s all fake? And your proof? Because coming here and claiming some sort of intellectual superiority over people who are accustomed to eating people with unsupported “theories” without any proof but your word is kinda… I dunno… idiotic. Show us empirical evidence that you know your hindquarters from a hole in the ground and we’ll take it under consideration. Otherwise, prepare to be eviscerated and left for dead. Logically speaking of course.

      1. That should have read; …eating people with unsubstantiated “theories for breakfast is none too bright. Expecting us to believe you without…

        There really should be an edit function…..

    3. Someone has to do a little research that’s for sure….

      Sir Isaac Newton – Astronomer
      Nikola Tesla – physicist, engineer, inventor
      Niels Bohr – physicist
      John F. Nash Jr. – mathematician, game theorist
      Norbert Wiener – mathematician, founder of cybernetics
      Isaac Asimov – biochemist, science-fiction author (I Robot)
      Stephen Hawking – astrophysicist
      Lise Meitner – chemist

    4. Megan,

      Please cite your sources and the logic behind your seeking out this website to post your snarky comment. And please keep it short.

    5. From what I know, what has been somewhat discredited (or rather never had any real credibility) is the theory of cognitive functions, not MBTI in general. Theory of cognitive functions tries to explain differences between the types based on some elusive abstract ideas, and is not grounded in empirical evidence. My personal opinion is that it serves mostly to give its users an impression of “understanding MBTI”. MBTI, on the other hand, just categorizes people based on some observable criteria, giving fairly reproducible results, and that’s it. It doesn’t even need any theory behind it in order to be useful.

      I’m INTP, by the way.

    6. Well that is an interesting statement, as those whom have read this archetype do find the comparative staggeringly accurate when applied to me.

      Therefore of all the MBTI assessments are flawed without theoretical integrity, do you care to explain the uncanny mirror regarding this assessment, and it’s uncanny mirrored interpretation?

      I think personally, as the world moves on through it’s history, the human – specifically the anglo-american – mind set leans more toward an avoidance of character assessments, leaning toward a need for viable relevance, in order to justify one’s existence, because over 90% feel unnecessary in the scheme of human development, in order to invalidate TI resultant data to the contrary,.

      After all, no one likes to be put in a box, and everyone – especially women – prefer to think of themselves as some how unique and one of a kind, when all data simply presents itself to the contrary.

      Also, please provide data – legit data – to indicate your assertions that the MBTI measurements are “discredited” and “lack of theoretical integrity”

      Otherwise, you’re pretty much completely full of shit. Proof is what proof does.

      1. According to an article that I have read online, the only topic that may be gender related are the judging function (thinking and feeling). It seems that 2/3 of the male population prefer the thinking function and 2/3 of the female population prefer the feeling function. Whether male or female, all other functions (introvert, extravert, sensing, intuition, judging and perceiving) seem to be divided without regard to gender. To provide insight – women in general feel good when they are perceived by the general population as being unique and one of a kind. This is the judging preference function (feeling) which tends to dominate over the other judging function (thinking). This also tends to be intensified when the second letter is “s” (sensing function) as these women tend to be intensely in the moment. Character assessments are commonly ignored not because they are not educational or important to some people, but because there is a lot of theory behind understanding what and how the theory works. With 70% of the population preferring the sensing function and only 30% of the population preferring the intuitive function, it is normal that the people with the sensing function are unable to understand theory as well as INTJ or INTP. INTJ and INTP both have very strong abilities to understand any theory or principle very quickly and accurately due to being very logically intelligent and coherent. Being an INTJ, I always ask one question “Does it work?” Due to the inability of sensing people to understand theory easily – this requires mental effort. Sensing types prefer physical effort over mental effort as this may be more natural to them. For anybody interested in more information about personality types, go to

        1. I thought that I was an INTJ. However, after evaluating in more detail on the ways that I react during stressful times and my desire to be more flexible than closed, I think that I am an INTP … WTF … am I doing here????

    7. Megan – from Sept 14, 2013.

      Firstly, you are wrong. Reliability and validity of the test is strong. The studies you are pointing to only show a lack of reliability because they test subjects over the long run – and, believe it or not, people’s personalities do change over time. As far as validity, it is as good as you can get from a non-pathology objective psychology test. Keep in mind the primary goal of this test is simply a general personality categorization for career suggestions.

      Secondly, and most importantly, it’s “realized” – not “realised.”

      1. Patrick
        The Jung/Myer Briggs test is not primarily for career suggestions. It’s meant for understanding oneself and others (which it is very usable for). Using it as a career suggestion is just one of the possible uses for this understanding, assuming that the careers indeed fit the personality type and your own personal character (which often they don’t). Typically it’s use in career assesment is actually an abuse, as it’s often used to label people and put them into a ‘fit’ or ‘unfit’ box, which is clearly not what this test should be used for.

        The reliability of the main types is high, but there is some serious critique aimed at the functions. While the main types usually give a good insight, the theory of the underlying functions is shaky at best, and often contradicts itself. But you don’t really need the theoretical functions to be able te appreciate the insights of the types themselves, so most people just ignore them completely. It’s mostly used as heuristical data, which indeed gives good results.

    8. Don’t be jealous, Megan. We simply enjoy being INTJ too much to stop. It’s not our fault the INTJ personality type accurately sums up who we are.

    9. regardless if it is, will be, has been disproven if you know someone who falls into the intj category these rules help a lot to explain why we act the way we do and there are always exceptions to the rule.

    10. I’m not seeing any data on this. Can you provide a link?

      I discovered I am an INTJ personality at around the same time you posted this comment (about a month ago), since then my life has been a lot more clear. I went from feeling entirely alone in my head and ideas, wondering why I never met anyone like me, to having meaningful connections with people over the internet and understanding my limitations more clearly. THAT, alone, was worth it.

    11. I disagree, although I haven’t done much research in the research of Myers Briggs, it seems to be very widely accredited, they are even taught in psychology classes as a way to look at how people might think. And in my personal experience, it has been pretty accurate, may I remind you too that stereotypes, regardless of what type, can only go so far.

      And PS I’m an INTJ and for the record we don’t go around boasting our “intelligence” or wearing arrogance like a sleeve (although perhaps some people might, who knows) as your comment so KINDLY implies, we just have a more analytic way of viewing the world and tend to have higher standards for which we choose to do things.

    12. Before I actually reply, I’d like to point out that, though mostly grammatically correct, your comment could have been worded significantly better. It annoys me. Now, as someone who appears to have at least a basic understanding of psychology, it surprises me that you fail to consider the regular debate over any forms of psychological typing. There are many proponents as well. Psychological theory is never considered proven. These personality types will fall in and out of favor with the psychological community. I would also like to point out that all of the personality types are merely general terms. There are many variations within the types, since certain characteristics are stronger in some than in others. I, for example, experience stronger emotional responses than most INTJs. We identify ourselves as INTJ because it is an accurate description of who we are.

    13. If you are just talking about the MBTI, then you might as well add the Big 5 to it. The two theories use slightly different means to come to the same conclusion. INTJ’s are very similar to the Big 5’s RxOEI. Not having an equivalent to the Big 5’s Calm/Limbic would be a poor reason to throw out the whole system.

      Further, the Big 5 does not describe the whole of an individual’s personality either, but could be argued that it is the best we have so far. Plenty of other sciences work under the same premise (see QM).

    14. Regardless of the comment you leave, it does not change anything. We enjoy having our ideas challenged as this is usually the only way we get an intelligent conversation from someone else. Making a decision on behalf of an INTJ is a good way to have your idea cut in little pieces and deconstructed in front of you. Please provide proof so that I can read the material and make a decision for myself. Making claim without proof is like driving a car with no tires. You are illogical and lack coherence, go with your ESFJ fluffy friends.

    15. Your statement is not accurate. Jung’s originating theory that individuals rely strongly upon a dominating type of thought process to integrate information has been shown to be not accurate but a less rigid view of the MBPT is still widely used and accepted. Instead of viewing an individual as fitting strictly within one of the sixteen personality types, individuals are placed on a scale for each of the four measures that make up their personality. For example a person can be strongly INTJ or he can be only predominantly INTJ with a close to balanced NP influence. It seems strange that you didn’t research the topic completely before expressing such a difinitive opinion, but then I am an INTJ and the behavior of most people is strange to me.

  3. Megan – These are typologies, nothing more. Rules of thumb, or general categories. They have not been ‘discredited’…Jung was a genius and it annoys me to no end about how accurate he was. Given the nature of typologies though, there’s wiggle room. All typologies are based on actual evidence, but should be taken with a grain of salt.

    (that’s something the idiots guide missed…we hate being outdone. We may respect the bastard, but hate ourselves for not being up to that level of quality (as yet!))

    If you’re thinking SPECIFICALLY of the Meyers-Briggs test (that just about everyone uses to determine their typology), you’ve certainly got an argument there. Discredited, no. Flawed? Certainly. The damn thing constantly identifies me as a ENTJ simply because I’ve passed on to a higher level of development (which typically comes with maturity, as identified by Jung). In other words, I’ve developed some of my “flawed” areas over time, which the personality test does not take into account. The test is merely a way to slot people into these typologies. The original theory by Jung is still regarded as genius… Unless you’re a young psych major with something to prove 😉

    Also…did you seriously post a criticism without a citation (or even giving an EXAMPLE) after just reading this? tisk tisk.

    another one of those damned INTJ Scientists (for reals, yo).

    p.s. to the writers of the article – “and” as an infinitive is quite normal these days. Prescriptively, it’s annoying to see it in print, sure. I’m sure you say it plenty enough every day though. It’s just another case of archaic writing not matching current speech and language usage. If it wasn’t used in formal writing, leave it be. Every time Sheldon Cooper complains about nonsensical prescriptive rules on Big Bang Theory, I want to shoot the idiot.

  4. Wow, looks like everybody here has something to prove. I’m an INTJ technically, but I do not identify with the so-called INTJs on here. Does anybody else recognize the absolute arrogance and elitism here in these comments? I mean, since when is it such an achievement to be completely emotionless? INTJs that belive they are superior think it is “cool” in a sense to be an emotionless freak. I got news for you from an outsider perspective: it isn’t. It just makes you look like some alienated freak that thinks they are better than everybody else when in reality, you are no better than the people you claim so “illogical” and “irrational”. Give me a break. You are no more logical than the ENFPs or any other personality type. Go prove yourself by actually doing something instead of just claiming some sort of inheritance that you are better than everybody else beacuse you are the cool, mysterious, logical, awesome, great INTJ. Please.

    1. Bo – you are not an INTJ, you are an ISTJ. It is better to bitch about other people than to look at yourself in the mirror. If you don’t like the site, go play outside with your dog. You’ll get the see the big picture and the dog will listen to your non-sense bullshit. Go away, martyr.

    2. Hello fellow intj, I personally believe that most of the “arrogance” is just our way of being friendly. Also, you seem to lean a little towards F. You may have just barely made the T. Perhaps you will find more “kindred spirits” on an infj website?

  5. It seems strange that, if you are as logical and intelligent as you’d probably like us to believe, you’d come to a website claiming that this personality test has been discredited without providing any proof of that statement.

    I am not saying that your claim is incorrect, but I am not going to go out of my way to do research into the validity of your statement. That is your responsibility.

    In short, if you’re going to make a comment discrediting the validity of the Myers-Briggs personality types (or anything anywhere, really), the least you can do is include links to the research that proves your point.

  6. I have found that when I try to explain things to people, they don’t get it, especially math. I tried to explain algebra to someone, and the conversation went something like this:

    “Now move that three to the other side”
    “Subtract it from this side”
    “But how does that move it?”
    “You are turning it to zero on this side and adding it to this side”
    “Why do I want to do that?”
    “So that you can get x by itself”
    “Why would I want to get x by itself?”
    “Because that’s the point of an equation”
    “Why would I need equations?”

    People get on my nerves! Just listen, and do what I say without question. I know what I’m doing! Ugh. I have to have so much alone time that I often miss out on stuff.

    1. Hey Natalie,
      I am not sure if you are saying you are an INTJ or if you are complaining about an INTJ because they ask too much and what to understand things in depth.
      Be more specific please.

    2. Natalie – This is not your fault, you have a strong level of intelligence and coherence that most other people just do not have.

  7. @Megan:

    1) We do not care. It’s just a name that has been given to a group of people (us), sharing a number of very specific personality traits.

    2) Psychology is not an exact science (in spite of everything psychologists would want us to believe). You cannot truly discredit anything, since everything is just an assumption, a theorem supported by observations. And I observe a number of people that fit the INTJ personality type rather well, or are you trying to tell me we don’t exist?

    3) Psychology walks in circles. Inner tendencies inside the field of study that psychology encompasses always tend to fluctuate, but eventually return to their starting point. It has to do with varying attributes each generation carries. Also, American and European psychology are so fundamentally different it’s almost like studying two different professions, so something that doesn’t work well for Americans might still fit rather well with us Europeans.

    4) Oh, and by the way. We don’t need to take the test itself to know that we are INTJ. If you do need the test, it is most likely that you are not one of us.

    Cheers ~

  8. Hey Megan, I couldn’t help but figure how another person decided that those who liked the MBTI were completely retarded. I don’t get how you guys always comes out and try to destroy something that never was: the MBTI is not an end in itself, but a tool to use in your everyday’s life.

    People like you are ignorant and it sadden me. You cannot use the MBTI in psychology because yes, it is not reliable enough. How many of those who used it had a hard time trying to figure their type? But it is not and NEVER was the goal of this system – it was, and still is, about helping yourself with a better understanding of your own AND a better understanding of others. If you take the stereotypical way, you are bound to fail.

    Now, if you know a better system, I am curious to hear what it is… until then, whatever you say here is pretty much the usual crap you get from anyone who believe, without doing any real research, that the MBTI fail.

  9. Done the test just now. Great, I’m one of you lot. I will have a good look round the site and hopefully will find some interesting bits. Obviously all you marvellous people are awake and will be at some stage of reasearch or teaching.
    Hello and welcome to whatever happened to common sense, I’m your host the doctor of common sense, ET Williams. Love his 7 (Ish) minute rants on youtube. Well amongst many other things.
    John, Liverpool

  10. You seem to assume that all INTJs are male. While female INTJs are rare (or at least appear to be rare), I don’t think it’s fair to only use the male pronoun for all examples. [Sorry, I know that’s nit-picking]

  11. I’m sure any number of us are INTJ or not. Arguing over opinionated emotional response tendencies is rather pointless. We are all individuals, if I was close to someone I’d probably feel a bit more involved with their identity, but horrible things happen everyday, no point in feeling bad about whats already happened, learn from the past, nothing more. INTJ is also not the full extent of anyone’s personality, I find myself to be very stereotypical of INTJ, but I’m not proud of it or believe that it defines me. We are but the sum of our experiences and our birth. I find it useful to take a step back from our trigger response emotions and understand that anyone in any situation did not have absolute choice over their life. The best thing to take away from anything is what we know happened, where are we now, how can I move towards the kind of experiences that fulfill me and how I can be a part of the experience of others to help them enjoy life and be fulfilled, given we have some degree of inclination to benefit that person, family, friend, she was so fucking cute I just wanted to take her and fuck the life out of her. Hey nobody is perfect, so focus on what you can do for yourself and what you can do for those you care about if any. INTJ still enjoy human interaction, just in a very different way than most, we want meaningful true content rich interaction, just don’t smother us, lol.

    That’s my take on it, if you don’t like it, fair enough, I doubt I’ll remember posting here anyways. Too much interesting stuff to explore in this world.

  12. I can’t stop laughing (inwardly) at the way you handled the last 4 “questions”. The moment I read the question you have already covered about 5 times on the page above, I felt similarly annoyed, and agree that your sarcasm was completely warranted and even mild by my standards. It granted me a gleeful sense of pride and joy. I also appreciated your apt description of our (INTJ’S) way to handle a bothersome individual or situation. The points line up precisely. I’m glad to know I’m not the only snarky, opinionated bitch out there. (In the best sense of the word)

  13. A real wise man should not never be too pround, he should know everybody has their own merits, that is god born us, god choose us be intj is not be pround yourself, but help and organize other people!!!

  14. As an INTJ I can confidently say this comment board, like every other, goes something like this:

    Person 1: Blah blah blah.
    Person 2: Oh yeah, well, blah blah blah and blah.
    Person 1: Yeah, but, blah blah blah blah blah.
    Person 2: Yeah, well, blah blah, blah blah.

    Label each line of this mock 4-line conversation as a, b, c and d. This may end after a, b, c or d… or a, b, c and d may be recycled and repeated.

    Note: a, b, c or d might not necessarily fall in that order.

  15. I took the MBTI many years ago and remember being told that people of that type were frequently scientists and that there were very few women who had that personality type. I already knew myself well enough to think this was obvious, but there wasn’t the information available in the Internet at that time to really explain what it meant. I retook the test online a few weeks ago, the results said I was an INTJ. I then took the test on several different websites and kept getting the same result.

    The information on the Internet made me feel much better about myself. I’m not a freak. Just a member of a very small group. There are other women like me who don’t understand most of their fellow females and are equally misunderstood by our fellow females. Yes, I prefer the Economist and Scientific American to Cosmo or People. I’ve read Vogue religiously since I was a teenager to identify current fashion trends that fit within my minimalist criteria. I don’t see a reason for wearing accessories that have no functional purpose. I cannot understand why someone would paint their nails an unnatural color much less paying someone to do it.

    I was made very uncomfortable a few weeks ago when a coworker returned from a trip to Asia with gifts for his coworkers. It was a silk shawl. It was a gift, an accessory, and it came an annoying extrovert.

    Despite being decently physically attractive, I scare the living daylights out of most men–even when I don’t intend to.

    I hate phoniness. I despise salesmen. I am prone to sarcasm. I have a few close friends to whom I am very loyal. I hate talking on the telephone. When I do have feelings, they are very strong and deep, but I’d rather die than wear them on my sleeve. I equate networking to root canal without the anesthesia.

    I find brownnosers to be among the most despicable creatures on the planet and those receptive to brownnosing pathetic.

    I’ve been categorizing and alphabetizing my ever growing book collection since I was a small child. My spices are also alphabetized. However, my living and work areas are chronically messy. Everything does have a place–it just takes a while for me to get around to putting it there.

    Yes, there are multiple voices carrying on numerous conversations in my head on a regular basis–usually when I’m bored–stuck in a meeting or on a telephone call. I had the nickname “Spacey” when I was a kid because I was frequently off in my own little world. Teachers would sometimes have to call my name more than once to pull be back into the real world. I’d then freak out my classmates by rattling off a correct, detailed answer. Odds were that I’d read whatever textbook chapter was currently under discussion weeks before when I became bored with the continuous and tedious repetition of some topic.

    I rarely lose my temper, but when it happens, it’s usually because I have presented a logical, fact-based argument to fix a problem at work and someone rejected my argument based on their emotions.

    I also began ignoring those whom I found annoying as a child. “Annoying” means emotional, not very bright or aggressively and evangelically extroverted.

    I don’t get upset by surprises, as it seems many INTJs do, but I’m rarely excited by them.

    I laughed out loud at the “Q&A.” So true.

    I’m quite fine being me. I try to remember not to be too blunt, and to provide introductory statement before I get to the point to make the non-INTJ feel better, but sometimes I forget.

  16. I do REALISE it is rather late and somewhat trivial to make this comment but I simply couldn’t help myself. Patrick in reference to your comment made October 9th at 4:31 AM (an exceptionally early time to be browsing the internet for easy targets). You mentioned rather condescendingly to Megan that the word REALISED was actually spelt realized. I have decided to enlighten you to the fact that in English speaking countries such as America you a entirely correct, however, in other English speaking countries such as Australia (my country of citizenship) the word is actually spelt “realised”. No need to thank me for educating you the pleasure was mine.
    Another thing, I’d like to ask if you people honestly speak and express your thought in this utterly robotic and lifeless version of Engish, if so my condolences.

  17. I’m so glad I rediscovered this site. The pet peeves section was absolutely spot on.

    As for the sarcasm . . . “bully atones, poots”


  18. Be cautious about claiming a static type in the MBTI scheme. As part of the speech at the Fourth International Congress for Analytical Psychology that kicked off the movement toward MBTI, Meir challenged the analysts at the conference to test their patients before, during and after therapy to see if the therapy changed their type. “Meir’s belief was that, since one’s psychological type is not static, a shift must inevitably take place in order for any in-depth analytical work to be judged effective” (p. ix. Lenore Thomson. 1998. “Personality Type: An Owner’s Manual”. Boston: Shambhala Publications). Change in MBTI is offered as proof that therapy is working.

  19. Disambiguation. The Meir quoted above is C.A. Meir, a champion of typology, not Isabel Briggs Meyers who helped create the MBTI 20 years before C.A. Meir gave this speech. Meir’s speech created an increase in the usage of the MBTI, which he used regularly.

  20. Ok everyone. I was enjoying reading these comments until I felt that they are going in circles without a really convincing solution for the argument. As most of us should know, no one knows anything. Every theory and discovering came from a deep understanding of things; each person presented his opinion and there always would be the ones that follow and the ones that argue and question what is behind that. Being able to use previous information and improve them have resulted on what we call “genius” or gifted person or high IQ, whatever you want to classify. So, I think that we should be focusing on this discussion on how we can improve the Myers Brigg or any other personality assessments instead of engaging in a useless discussion. These infantile discussions don’t led to greatness contributions to society. Instead, they deteriorate and waste our full potential!! This is what the world needs, people that get together to work towards a solution, not to compete in a mediocre way.

    P.S who doesn’t know that even the greatest genius in history had a lot of enemies and people that argument in the same as certain people said it here (discredited due to poor reliability and validity and a lack of theoretic integrity).. And then, thousands of years later, someone decide to keep working on those ideas and boom here we are.. Instead of keeping the process of advancing our knowledge we stay trapped to meaningless people’s opinion.

    Another P.S Please expect to find some grammar errors here, I did not have time to take in to the writing center to have help! English is my third language.

  21. “No type is more self-confident”

    Actually, since your self-worth is so inordinately tied to a need for superiority
    over others you are completely insecure about possibly not being superior. Thus, you are quite easy to destroy. We just don’t do it out of compassion (ooh, there’s that word) for you. We hate to see other crumble.

    p.s. Since we are on to you and your colossal, fear based need for superiority, your “that’s irrelevant” weapon is ineffective.

  22. “No type is more self-confident”

    Actually, since your self-worth is so inordinately tied to a need for superiority
    over others you are completely insecure about possibly not being superior. Thus, you are quite easy to destroy. We just don’t do it out of compassion (ooh, there’s that word) for you. We hate to see others crumble.

    p.s. Since we are on to you and your colossal, fear based need for superiority, your “that’s irrelevant” weapon is ineffective.

  23. “We judge ourselves more harshly than we judge others.”

    Yes, this is true, and you are way too hard on yourselves. AND that
    is why you err when you say “No type is more self-confident”.
    You only tell yourself that about the confidence to keep your colossal
    melancholic fear (yes you have that emotion in spades) from triggering INTJ self-destruction. It is a terrible spiral for you, and only genuine humility is the remedy. But for most INTJ’s obtaining genuine humility is akin to Frodo’s journey to return the ring.

  24. You are wrong again (amazing how often that happens!).
    You are an INTP.
    INTJ’s won’t put all the effort you did into humor and word play in this blog.

    p.s. It’s so much fun bashing your “rational superiority”

  25. Q: Why does my INTJ just start nodding and smiling after we’ve been talking for a couple of minutes?


    When an INTJ is silent or ignoring you or just trying to be polite, nodding and smiling, it is because they have concluded that you are beyond hope. An INTJ will typically help another to understand something more complex or something you failed to see or consider but if you are not teachable, we will allow your freedom of folly.

    I know because because I am a INTJ.

  26. I’m an INTJ and really, I love your post!!!
    Since we rarely praise people, its a high regard for your work
    Keep writing!

  27. I found these actually very humorous. I think I’ll even share a few of these with a few non INTJ friends of mine. They’ll probably (maybe) understand it.

  28. God what? He will burns us in hell? lol lol lol. My dearest, I knew that I was just another piece of meat on this planet, but do not think that’s too unreasonable?? Burn in hell is too much for my head!
    Ok barbecues! Come join the queue then. Hell, here we go! Next!

  29. I participated in the Myers-Briggs test about two months ago. Since then, I have quietly read articles and browsed internet sites containing the traits and characteristics of INTJ’s. I never made any comments until now. I’m just happy I’m not alone. So many broken relationships, so many people who have labeled me as arrogant. So many times I said to myslef “f*ck em, they’ll never get it.” So many times I have wandered off while at meetings at work. I cannot stand incompetent bosses, I openly challenge them if they belittle my fellow coworkers. Yet, I prefer to manipulate from behind the scenes. If I feel someone is trying to manipulate me, it becomes a challenge where a quick death will do (unless I’m intrigued by the manipulator, then I purposely drag it out for intellectual entertainment). Littlefinger and Tywin Lannister are my favorite characters from Game of Thrones, and no one understands why! There are just so many characteristics associated with INTJ’s that I have, it’s a pleasure to know there is an ‘us.’ Thank you for the well-written article.
    I do have a question (you know I will tirelessly perform the research anyway). What personality type of the opposite sex do we get along with most?? Any suggestions?? I don’t think I’ve ever met an INTJ woman before. I’d be very interested in meeting one. But, who are INTJ men most likely to be compatible with? Please don’t say the spontaneous type who will attempt to drag me to a party where I have to know what year a specific outfit was made by a fashion designer (I still have to remind myself I’m not alone).
    Again, thank you!

  30. Socionics is betterthan mbti imho, though it takes a little bit longer to finish. I was iNTP in mbti then shifted to iNTJ still mbti, finally when I reached the age of 25 I tested both INTj in socionics and mbti. Your mood whn taking the test affects the result and you shouldn’t take the test right away if someone suggested it to you.

  31. This thread is making my head hurt… from shaking it in slight disbelief that some people, I won’t categorize them based on personality classification, truly hold it gainst us for being wired as we are. Let me say it is NOT an easy existence and one more often than not misunderstood by others. It is not horrid insecurity nor an incredible god complex. We don’t walk through life proud that we are superior, cold, emotionless or detached. It is simply that we are guests to our own “Hotel California” which is our mind. Judging an INTJ by the standards and filters utilized to view society as a whole and you will miss the people we really are.

  32. “When an INTJ is silent or ignoring you or just trying to be polite, nodding and smiling, it is because they have concluded that you are beyond hope.”

    I think this is really interesting. I am an INTJ. So I understand. But my personal perception is, that other personality types also do this (nod silently and politely while thinking their conversation mate is hopeless). Or?

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